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If you have never seen the Jersey Shore on television than consider yourself very lucky.

We got a Situation Here

Take two of the hottest franchises in all entertainment.  Mix them together and what do you got?  If you answered  'Any of the Lego games'  then you would be correct.  But what would you get if you took a unoriginal old ass game and mixed it with a horrible reality show?  You would get Street Fighter Vs. Jersey Shore.

The cast of Jersey Shore set back Italian stereotypes at least 50 years.  Street Fighter VS. Jersey Shore aims to do the same for video games.  The gameplay is EXACTLY the same as every other Street Fighter game ever created, but the new Jersey Shore characters all have new abilities unique to them.  There are 8 Jersey Shore characters to play as, and some of their special moves have been revealed and are listed below.

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Snookie's Fat Ass Squat
Snookie may be only 4' 9" tall, but the chunky little midget manages to pack quite a bit of ass.  Her huge pasta ass is showcased in this game as she squats up and down on the face of her disgusted and helpless opponents.

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Pauly's Cement Head
Pauly D has more chemicals in his hair than Charlie Sheen has in his body.  His cement head special move has you charging at your opponent and impailing them to death with his spikey hair.

  

The Golden Age of Games and Girls collides

So all the golden girls are dead.  Their legend lives on with Street Fighter Vs. Golden Girls.  Uh-Oh.  You say Bette White isn't dead yet?  Well she may not be in real life, but you can kill that wrinkly old bitch in this fantastic 2D action fighting game.

The pacing of the game is slower than previous Street Fighter games to realistically represent the Golden Girls.  Some fights may take as long as 6 hours as the Golden Girls characters in the game may stop fighting to take frequent bathroom breaks, take a nap, or go to play BINGO.

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Buy Street Fighter VS. Golden Girls and save $8 on a purchase of Depends. Now you can shit yourself like a old person without interrupting your video game!
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Buy Street Fighter VS. Golden Girls and recieve 3 copies of Playboy for Seniors. (Erection enabling pills not included) ** Click on picture for larger view **
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Beating on old people in real life is alot of fun.  But in most of the world, beating the elderly can result in inprisonment.  This game is a great substitute for beating the elderly without getting in trouble. 

 

ALL Teletubbies must die a painful death

On behalf of the United States I would like to thank our friends in Great Britian for all their contributions to the entertainment industry.  Great Britian was doing outstanding work, introducing the world to the Beatles, the Rolling Stones, and some beautiful, talented woman like Elizebeth Hurley and Susan Boyle.
Then, Great Britian introduced the Teletubbies to the world, and all their past successes were soon forgotten. 

The teletubbies are four unintelligible, creepy-looking puppet things.  They celebrate their homosexuality by each of them having a unique phallic symbol on it's head. The teletubbies are believed to be soley responsible for poor communication skills in today's children. the war in Iraq, and also smallpox.

While the show is horrible, the game is equally bad.  The.........

*The writer who was reviewing this game apparently stapled his eyes shut, and poured acid on his hands so he would never have to play this game again.*
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I dreamed a dream of you in your panties Susan Boyle! Bring your friend to!

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   Who likes Teletubbies besides child molesters?  Answer - no one.

                  

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